This is not what my Dad looks like, I know there was a lot of confusion at the Zander house ice cream social last night. I know the resemblance is uncanny and I look like I remember the Titans but the truth is we had a conversation once and I couldn’t even pick them out of a crowd. Thought I’d get that out of the way.
I love living in Zander house with my roommates. Everyday has been like a jam packed Saturday morning of cartoons, cinnamon rolls, and full jurisdiction of the remote. I enjoyed living in the dorms last year but this is a different experience that has made me grow up a little bit. I don’t mean grow up emotionally or mentally, but more in the sense that I will have to comb over my hair in the mirror everyday like the bald part is an opening to the insecurity of my soul in need of sewing back together. Zander house is a fun TLA, I do have some minor problems with living here though. Real minor, nothing too drastic.
The other night I was watching TV and all of a sudden people were talking to me through it. At first I thought it was a bad reception of Bubble Boy, Starring Jake Gyllenhall. After getting sucked through my closet I quickly realized they were ghosts. Bill Murray taught me not to be afraid of ghosts, so I wasn’t, but one ghost gave me the darkest feeling I’ve had since I tried to eat a Qdoba Burrito through Intravenous feeding. My roommates all tried to save me but they didn’t have Craig T. Nelson from Tv’s Coach or everybody’s spiritual medium not named Oprah, Tangina Barrons. Hector Ruiz tried to save me by offering one of the ghosts some of his frequent flier miles but that ghost was afraid of planes. Kevin Sundberg offered one green eggs and ham, but he did not like them Sam I am. Finally, Alex Bowers and Connor Cummings put a rope through both tunnels. The bedroom closet was the first entry point of the tunnel and the Zander roof was the second. I came out on the roof and was greeted by my roommates with an abundance of dishes to wash. I’ve never been more happy to escape certain eternal torment more than a few nights ago watching Miley Cyrus. Just jumped on that joke bandwagon. I might have to give away a dime to someone for the lack of originality on that one. If you think that was all just the plot of Poltergeist too, you are very wrong, Poltergeist has a little girl, I’m obviously prettier than a little girl. Anyways, that’s really been the only problem with Zander, not really a big one. It’s a great place to live where everybody knows your name and they’re always glad you came.
If you ever want to stop by and start a band with me, feel free.
Zander is easy to find, “second star on the right and straight on until morning”. That’s where you will find the lost boys who refuse to grow old.
Posted on August 29th, 2013 by garymiller11
Filed under: Gary Miller